The best advice I can give you

Over the course of my career, I have counseled thousands of people. Some people seek assistance in writing a resume. Some want help crafting a succinct elevator pitch. Many want advice as to how to move their careers forward, and how to achieve their end goal. Almost invariably, I give my clients the same pieces of core advice. Now, I’m going to share that advice, gleaned from many years and my experience with a variety of people, with you.

It’s not about you. This is the universal truth of job seeking. Other than you, your friends, and your family, no one else cares about you. They care about what’s in it for them, specifically, how can you help with a need or pain point that they have. You need to make sure that all of your communications are outside-in. That is, they need to be focused on your market (the hiring managers and recruiters in your industry) and their pain, and how you are a solution. Far too many people make the mistake of focusing on themselves and their own achievements and accolades, rather than on the problems the market has. Stand out by truly focusing on your audience.

Appearances do matter. Not just the way you dress for an interview, but also the manner in which you present yourself online, or when networking in real life. You are a professional. You should look and act the part.

What you don’t say might be even more important than what you do say. Some psychologists have said that people pay only 30% of their attention to the content of what you're saying, and 70% of their attention to how you present it. So be sure that you aren't fidgeting, that you make eye contact, smile, and that you have a firm handshake.

Build and nurture your network. Networking is the process of meeting people and building trust in you. Visit groups that spark your interest. Don’t limit yourself to professional or job seeker networking activities. What else do you like to do? It could be a political group, cause you care about, or a charity. Networking happens everywhere, not just in a professional context. Also, volunteering is a great way to network, build your brand, and to give back (or pay forward) to a group that's helped you in the past.

And finally, the most important piece of advice that I can give anyone is this: Worry about things that matter. So much energy is expended worrying about things that are unimportant. Whether you wear a solid black jacket or one with a pattern is not important. The font that you use for your resume? Not terribly important. Having researched the company and the hiring manager beforehand? Critical. A succinct elevator pitch is also something to spend time developing.

There you have it. Years of speaking with job seekers and career changers distilled into five main themes. Be your best self every day. Be kind. Be patient. It WILL happen.